Coping with Comparison in the digital age
With all the exposure and information overload in our face 24*7, its become a rarity to feel fulfilled with your journey and stay focused on your lane.
Even if you happen to be a lucky, wise one to feel happy with where you are, the occasional comparison with feelings of inadequacy will inevitably creep in. The classic saying ‘the grass is greener on the other side’ dominates our digital age of the 21st century.
Here’s how this usually plays out: You’re feeling pretty excited about what you’re doing and making small wins until…..
You notice your friend suddenly has become a sensation on twitter.
Oh wait, your junior in school has published a goddamn book!
And ofcourse who else but your closest friend is minting money in the world of crypto-
‘what on earth am I even doing with my life’.
Enter the guilt, frustration, disappointment, jealousy, envy, and basically feeling like complete shit.
As troublesome as it is, our judgments of ourselves are related to our perception of others. It’s a giant entangled web that stems from the deep midsection of our brains.
And while we can sit back and play victim at the mercy of our innate wiring, we’re better off helping ourselves by making different choices. Some of these can be at rescue:
Distract unworthy thoughts with some action- Getting stuck in the comparison trap is capable of paralyzing anyone. We often lose hope when we notice ourselves not making half the progress as others and that can be deterring. But using that as an opportunity to take some steps, however small they may be, is where things can start to change. Speaking from experience, the brain gets a thrill gets when it witnesses some momentum. So do something that keeps you busy because the idle mind is dangerous territory.
Let your hidden light shine — Looking up to people is great and offers inspiration to help you get where you need to. But rather than getting fan struck by those you idolise, notice your similarities with them. That’s right, if you’re greatly inspired by someone that means you see parts of you in them. So notice your similarities and strengths because you cant resonate with someone you have nothing in common with.
Moreover, studying such people and understanding the strategies behind their success can prove worthy in bringing a sense of direction for yourself.
Record your wins- Instead of wallowing in the ‘I’ll never make it’ syndrome, take a note of what you are good at and document your wins. Hopefully, you’d have followed step one of taking small tiny action for this to happen. The idea is to give your stubborn brain proof of your capability and rewire those nasty neurons that have been stuck in the comparison web for far too long.
What we don’t realise enough is that staying focused on ourselves and enjoying our respective journeys has become the greatest need of our times.
The power of self-compassion cannot be estimated so maintaining an empowering self-dialogue is imperative because how you talk to yourself sets the narrative for everything else.
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